Part 2: Attack of the Clones! ... well not
Clones per se, OH JUST READ IT!
Since the Bulleteer Society of
Justice appeared on New Earth – 1. The people have been overjoyed at
their arrival. The planet had no heroes, and the Bulleteers were swift
with their bringing of justice... and rants. Sean gets in his
Thanagarian armor and Jim just slips on his What-Not uniform. They enter
the mighty Hall of Bullets. As they sit at the Table of Justice, they
talk about the events of the night.
“Hey Jim, did you have weird dreams
“Yeah Norge, I had bizarre What-Nots in
my head or something.”
Sean pulls out his notes, Jim pulls out
“So Jim, what's your Speeding Bullets
going to be?”
Jim looks at the stack in front of
him... so many comics...
“I don't know yet. I'll think about it
while I'm cutting my hair... and WHAT-NOT!” A pair of scissors is
conjured by the What-Not ring, as they do their thing. Sean starts to
laugh, “Are you going to get a buzz cut or something?” Jim looks up,
“Dude, I'm not in the military.” They both have a laugh as Sean prepares
his notes and Jim flips through a few issues.
The Hall of Bullets serves not only as
the base of the Bulleteer Society, but as home, training ground,
recording studio and LCS. That's right, half an acre of comics are
located in the building! You can find most of the Bulleteers here,
especially on Wednesdays. The Teen Bulleteers, Steve and Vida, are the
only ones in the store on this Tuesday. They are discussing comics when
a mysterious voice comes up from behind them.
“So this is the legendary Comic Hole
within the Hall.”
Vida and Steve turn around. A cloaked
individual is standing outside the door. Next to him is a very blond
teenager with shopping bags and the preppiest outfit you can imagine...
and she looks just like VIDA! Before our Teen Bulleteers can react, they
are thrust against the wall by an invisible force projected by the
cloaked individual. “You may have mastery over metals, but I - ” The
mystery man takes his hood off to reveal... STEVE?!?
“ - Master gravity!!!”
Steve gives his apparent doppleganger a
puzzled look, “dude what does that have to do with my magnetic powers?
They're not related?!?”
Gravity Steve looks a little embarassed
and screams out, “SHUT UP! MY POWERS WORK FINE!”
Vida's bow is suddenly placed in front of her, arrow loaded. Steve uses his magnetic powers to aim at the mysterious double. Blond Vida is trying to warn Gravity Steve, but Gravity Steve is focused on crushing our Teen Bulleteers. Vida lets loose on the arrow. Steve is guiding it to it's target. It connects, piercing Gravity Steve's hand. Blood is all over the floor. Blond Vida screams.
“EWWW BLOOD!! GET IT AWAY FROM ME”
Vida rolls on the ground and prepares
another arrow, she glares at Blond Vida:
“You be quiet now. Ditz.”
Blond Vida becomes offended. Her
diatribe is so powerful it numbs the minds of the Teen Bulleteers.
“Oh my gawd you did not just insult
me... you look SOOOO tacky with your stupid outfit.. green is SOOO out.
Gurl you need to go to Gap or something and buy some better clothes. I
go shawping ALLL the time and maybe I would pick out an outfit for you
but you're not good enough to be with me and my grrlfriends so that's
why I'm GOING TO KILL YOU!!”
Steve and Vida struggle on the floor.
They are writing in pain. The sickeningly sweet bubble gum voice of
Blond Vida drives them mad. A strange glint appears in Vida's eyes
though. Before the two pass out, 2 Knight Wing shuriken (copyright 2007,
tradmarked property of Brent Kossina) strikes the heads of Gravity Steve
and Blond Vida, who are knocked out. Steve struggles to his feet.
“Who the hell are these losers?” Brent
gives Steve a hand. Steve looks around, “Apparently, they're clones or
something of me and Vida...” They both turn to help Vida, but she is
standing, with her back turned to them, slouched over. “...Vida,” Steve
asks, “are you okay?”
She speaks, but does not turn around,
“Who is Vida?” She turns to reveal Vida has transformed... “I am
VIDARA!” She pounces on Knightwing and Steve. They struggle against her
inhuman strength. They are unable to hit the alarm, as Vidara drags them
toward the back issue section...
In the HyperUniversal Meditational Zen
Room... Raph contemplates the contents of the Universe and his new
column. He senses danger in the Comic Hole... and he awakens. “There's
something wrong... the universal boundaries have been severed. I must do
someth—UHN!” A figure stands behind him, a lead pipe in hand. “No you
Matthew Guy steps outside into the
atrium of the Hall of Bullets. He looks up into the sky, smiles and
A beam of sun-light strikes Matthew
Guy, but that is not all! A man who looks just like Matthew Guy holds
the Excelsior Knight by the throat. “You am friend. You must LIVE!”
Sean and Jim are going over their notes
and discussing the show, when an explosion rocks the room. Rubble starts
to fall on top of our heroes. Sean valiantly smashes the rubble with his
mace, but he finally misses and the two are crushed under the rubble of
the decimated Dining area! Kendra aka Super Mom walks in on this... she
is stunned! “What the hell happe-AAAAGH!!” A broken steel beam smashes
into her, impaling her! The Bulleteers have suffered their first loss!
Outside. A group of people stand and observe the carnage. The Bullet Tower has fallen into the Hall! Chaos reigns! The ringleader stands on top of the hill, his troops are ready
to strike at the Raging Bulleteers,
weakened and fallen!
“BOYS!” He turns to face his troops...
“GO GET 'EM”
We finally see the face of the
ringleader.. it is none other than
SEAN WHELAN?!? DR. NORGE!!??!!!
The villains charge at the Hall of Bullets... it is truly a CRISIS!
To be Continued in Part 3!
Crisis On Infinite Bullets: Secret
Origins – Kendra Behn-Smith aka Super Mom!
Kendra Behn-Smith is of rare geek nobility: She's a GEEK GIRL! She chose to marry a mere mortal (non-geek) man. She is dedicated to the cause of fighting evil on NEW-EARTH 1 as SUPER-MOM. She also picks up her children from school and makes them sandwiches for lunch. Without the crust! Can I have one?
When Kendra and family landed on New Earth 1, she was determined to fight evil, but protect her family. Kendra stays at the Hall of Bullets after she tucks her kids in and then when they leave for school.. she is out again!
Kendra's powers are unknown.
Although it might be kinda pointless, as I'm giving her an origin story
after I just killed her... or IS IT????!???
Kendra Behn-Smith... Cameo... or MORE?????